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Is he cheating?


An avid reader writes, "I have been with this guy for over 2 years and lately he has not been into me as he normally used to be. Is he cheating on me? Should I confront him? 
 
First I'd like to apologize on not replying to your question earlier than now. I believe when you said he has not been into you as he normally used to be, you mean there's a distancing or disconnect from how things used to be. It is understandable that you feel that he could be cheating on you. However, that may not be the case. There are a lot of contributing factors to the issue at hand. 1) He may be going through something in his life that has his attention. Stress from other areas of life or adjusting to new life situations may be a contributing factor to his new behavior.  2) You two may be dissociated emotionally in some ways that need to be addressed. There may be areas in your relationships that may not be the greatest that needs some attention. The result of those attention seeking areas in your relationship may cause it to be expressed in this fashion.  3) Your relationship may be in need of a spark. All relationships go through phases and valleys which is path of the relationship growth. A new relationship is one without flaws and faults. However, when relationships age, couples go through phases that make or break the relationship. This could be a possibility in your relationship. 
 It is pertinent to note that all the aforementioned factors center around communication. Communication is the most common cause of relationship troubles and the least part of a relationship that is taken seriously in most cases. Communication is key in every relationship and when applied effectively can correct many issues and right many wrongs. Therefore, it does not necessarily mean your boyfriend is cheating on you because he is not into you as he formerly was. It could be one or a mix of the forenamed factors. What is my advice or suggestion? Confront him with your feelings regarding his attraction to you and initiate a healthy dialogue to identify the cause of the issue in the relationship. When having this conversation, it is recommended to always focus on the issue at hand and also to address the topic of interest in a mild and non judgmental manner. I would advise against bringing up the idea that he might be cheating. If there is one thing a relationship highly does not need is someone being accused of anything. In short, when discussing any issue in a relationship, stay on point and do not involve any external factors or assumptions. Assumptions should not be let in a relationship because when you assume, you only make an ass out of u and me.
 
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