Relationships - you make it or break it!

    The topic of women being submissive in marriage has been one that has drawn a lot of negative reactions from women in recent years. I believe this could be as a result of bad leadership from some men, the influence of social media on relationships, differences in eras in relation to women’s progression in the work force or society amongst other reasons. However, this topic is a sensitive one and one that goes beyond couple of reasonings that may fuel the negative connotations.  Couple of months ago, I had a conversation with a colleague who is a woman and our discussion centred on roles of women and men in a marriage. She argued that women and men are equal in a marriage and there is nothing as submissiveness that should be expected from a woman and that the man is not the leader or head of the household. So is this true? Are these the feelings or sentiment shared by women in marriages or those seeking to be in marriages? Although, I believe that God is the author of ...

 I spent some time with my mum today. We talked about a lot of things that revolved around me and life in general. The topic of marriage came up and we talked about how marriage and the idea of marriage had evolved over the years. Marriage back in her time and that of her parents or grand parents were based on the very basic things that mattered back then. Men chose to marry women who were polite, had a nice smile or simply just because they came from a good, reputable family. Those were the simpler times. Times when the parameters set for a mate can be argued to have been based on quality over quantity. Nowadays, marriage is a whole different ball game.  I believe everyone knows that marriage is a union of two souls to become one. However, some people going into marriage don't understand that it is a not a transactional relationship but one that is meant to collectively pull singular resources together to achieve an expected goal. This is because some women believe that the m...

Marriage is not only sacred but instrumental  to the union of a man and woman who have made the decision to commit to one another irregardless of any situation that may arise. Well at least that is my philosophy when it comes to marriage.  When two people enter a long-term relationship, in most cases it leads to marriage.  Most people use marriage and wedding interchangeably because they are similar. However it is important to note that both are different.  A marriage involves the decision and commitment of the relationship while a wedding is the celebration of that marriage.  It is an amazing and beautiful spectacle when you walk down the street or arrive at a place and opportuned to see an old couple who you happen to discover have been married for multiple years.  It depicts love as a lifestyle with underpinnings carved into the wavelengths of eternal and true feelings. I was having a conversation with a friend when getting married to the right person ca...

A little over a week ago, I was involved in a conversation with a friend of mine who showed me a thread of Instagram posts. These posts centered on the idea that men married women that were available at the time these men were ready to settle down rather than women they are in love with.  This seemed interesting to me and got me thinking.  Is there some truth to this? Do i think it applies to all men? Yes I think there's some truth to it and no i do not think it applies to all men. I believe there are significant number of men that do fall in love with the girl they marry and there are some men who get married based on availability. Human beings are beings of choices and preferences.  Both men and women have qualities that they want in a mate be it physical, emotional, mental or spiritual. Since, we do not live in a perfect world where we get everything we want or need, we prioritize our preferences in a mate and choose the things we need versus the things we want when ...

An avid reader sent me a message days ago on on social media and asked me the duration of a relationship before it should materialize into marriage. It is a great dating question and i thought i make it into a blog for this month (since February is termed love month). When two people go into a relationship, the expectation is that it ends in marriage or some sort of longtime union especially if they are both marriage ready. When I say marriage ready, I mean they are both mature in age and have some sort of financial or career stability. So back to the question, how long does it take for a relationship to mature into marriage?  Well, it is dependent on three factors.  It depends on the two individuals, where they are at in life and where they are at in the relationship.  The two individuals have to be in sync and be at the same point mentally and emotionally to consider getting married to each other. They also have to be where they want to be in life to be ready to conver...